Thursday, November 17, 2011

Family

For two years I have gone back and forth on: if and when and how I should tell my family and for two years I tried to change my feelings, and my thoughts. I feared my family would stop talking to me, I feared they would regret me, I feared they would guilt me into feelings I should have, I was afraid of so much. But tonight is another example of how wrong I was my aunt sent me a text message it read: I still love you, your my niece. I wanted to cry from being so happy, I called her to talk I was afraid to do so but I did it, she asked me of I was finally happy, I said YES, she said good. I was afraid of it being an awaked conversation but it was good, the hardest part which made me cry was talking about how to tell my grandma, i feel i might kill her with bad news I have been so afraid of it i have went to counseling and talked about it, he always tried to say you cant kill some one with bad news but he doesn't know my grandma, she doesn't even know about abbys kidneys heck she doesn't even know a lot about her health due to edited conversations. she and I joked about being out of the closet finally over all it was a good talk, and I'm happy to have gotten over that fear, now other family members might not be as comfortable to talk to but i hope over time we can all settle down be accepting and be happy.

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